it's almost CHRISTMAS!!! i dont really have much happy memories during christmas. i stopped dreaming of christmas when mom worked abroad. ofcourse the only thing that really excites me during this season is that it's jesus' birthday and carolers, misa de gallo, christmas card from mom. for most kids  christmas is the happiest month of the  year coz they will receive lots of gifts and parties and food, but not for me. as i was growing up, christmas has been the most stressful month for me. more stressful than final exams actually. you know why? because it was during this month that you have to attend parties at school, exchange gifts. i was not wxcited joining parties coz i didnt know if i would be able to pay the christmas contribution or the exchanging of gifts. dad didnt care, but it's part of the school activity, attendance was needed. most of the time i didnt participate in the exchanging of gifts coz i didnt want that my christmas baby wont be able to accept a gift from me or be disappointed with my gift. i remember going home during lunch time coz i didnt have food to eat coz it was a "bring your own food" party. i just waited for my sisters to meet me in our meeting place and just went home. maybe that was the reason why everytime i see and hear kid carolers i see the real meaning of christmas. i still believe in santa...santa could be any of us..i so love christmas coz i see a lot people happy, family bonding together. ..